Male Sexuality Facts

Facts, Theories, And Information on Male Sexuality:

Male Sexual Problems

Delayed ejaculation

Delayed ejaculation is a condition in which a man finds it difficult or even impossible to ejaculate during intercourse.

This goes against everything that we expect about male sexuality, which is generally depicted in our society is an insatiable urge to enter, thrust, and ejaculate.

Of course the fact is that this is a myth in itself, but it certainly does not depict the reality of delayed ejaculation. The truth of the matter is this: men with delayed ejaculation often have a limited level of sexual arousal, and they often find it quite challenging to reach the point of ejaculatory inevitability.

This ejaculatory dysfunction generally stems from the fat that a man either has a low level sexual arousal because he is disconnected from his internal world of sexuality, or because he is harboring emotional issues towards his partner which inhibit the expression of his sexuality.

Now why would a man experience low levels of sexual arousal? Some ideas are outlines at First of all perhaps because he is in a relationship with a woman that he doesnít actually want to be in relationship with. Truth is, it happens.

Or maybe heís feeling angry, or hostile towards women in general or his own partner in particular. Sadly, that happens too.

Unless youíre actually a sex therapist working in this field, itís hard to imagine how much human male sexuality is affected, interfered with, or generally corrupted by, the influence of traumatic childhood events.

Delayed ejaculation can be traumatic for all concerned.

Now delayed ejaculation can be seen as an expression of male sexuality that has become slightly corrupted because of the detachment between the arousal mechanism and the expression of its fulfillment in ejaculation.

The excessive of separation and detachment between the subjective process of sexual arousal and the bodily reaction of ejaculation is often due to some kind of mental blockage which can be described as spectatoring.

This is a term used by sex therapists to indicate a situation where a man is actually observing himself engaging in sexual activity, rather than fully participating and indulging his own senses in his own sexual experience.

Separation from oneís own internal erotic world in this way is a common feature of delayed ejaculation and itís not particularly unusual for men who feel some kind of fear or anger about sexuality in general to respond with a defense mechanism like this.

Fortunately, a cure is actually really quite straightforward and simple: when relationship issues are coming into play, there needs to be a degree of reconciliation between the man and his partner so that open and honest communication can continue, or perhaps, in some cases, start.

Then, the issues must be spoken about openly and honestly; these may include deep issues that threaten the relationship.

Although this can be scary for many couples, the truth of the matter is that honesty and openness are always the best policy in resolving sexual difficulties, and if they are not treated in this way, then the relationship itself may actually be threatened.

 A huge number of men, all around the world, have something in common Ė ejaculation problems.

Itís difficult to determine what is premature or early ejaculation, but experts tend to agree that a man who ejaculates inside two minutes of of beginning to make love to his partner may well be neither sexually satisfying her nor receiving maximum erotic fulfillment himself.

However, curing fast ejaculation is not just about sexual fulfillment for the woman . As already mentioned, consistently coming too swiftly can ensure that a man has a low sexual self- esteem. Preventing or delaying ejaculation means youíll also have a happy partner in your life. Thatís because women actually crave the intimacy of extended lovemaking.

All of which means you really havenít any choice about learning to delay your orgasm if you want to be described as a really good lover. The average duration of intercourse turns out to be around three minutes, which is a pretty shocking statistic.

Lovemaking that lasts for so short a time will not satisfy most women. The rewards of improving your love- making skills come from the satisfaction that you feel, both inside and outside the bedroom, as well as the respect of your partner.

Even so, it can be a challenge to deal with premature ejaculation. A primary reason for this is that when you get into bed, and the excitement of intercourse begins to mount, all the motives you had can easily be forgotten. Sadly each time you come too quickly, your self- respect takes another knock.

Despite that, with the correct tactic, the vast majority of men discover they are able to substantially improve their performance during sexual intercourse and become longer lasting lovers pretty quickly. Here are three simple tips that you can use immediately to make a big difference to your self- control during can make.

First question: are you 100 % committed to last longer during intercourse? Itís no use saying that you want to prevent premature ejaculation and then forgetting your intention to do better in the excitement of lovemaking. Actions are what are important here, not what you say.

So getting your head in the right place is essential: if you donít want to last longer for your own pleasure, do it for your partnerís sake, because when sheís happier in bed your whole relationship will improve dramatically. Itís an important first step.

Second: discover ways to relax as you have sex. Now donít misunderstand me, having intercourse is thrilling, and so a lot of tension builds on the way to climax. But the reality is that when your muscles are tense and your body is aroused Ė which you see in the form of shallow breathing and slight perspiration- youíre almost certainly going to ejaculate more quickly than you would if you were more relaxed.

One way that you can prove this to yourself is to make love in the man on top position and then to try sex with the woman on top. In the first case youíre much more tense, and youíre likely to ejaculate much more quickly.

You can keep control during sex by ensuring that you remain focused on whatís going on in your body, relaxing your muscles every time they become tense, and slowing down your breathing every time it comes faster .

Also make sure you slow down the rhythm and pace of your movements during intercourse. Equally, every time you find your breathing is quick and shallow, take a deep breath, pause, and re- establish a slower rhythm.

Thirdly, you want to develop sensitivity to the signals your body provides, signals that inform you how near you are to your ejaculation. The majority of men who wish to last longer in bed have little awareness of how near they are to the point of ejaculatory inevitability ( thatís the point where you already know you will ejaculate and nothing can stop it happening ).

And so, when you actually have awareness of how aroused you are, you have the power to slow down the rhythm of sex or stop making love altogether until your arousal is dropped to a safe level.

Take time for yourself to practice during masturbation, using a good lubricant such as olive oil. Bring yourself towards your orgasm again and again, but each time stop before you actually ejaculate. As you do this, maintain a sense of how aroused you are, and ensure that you listen to the signals of your body, so that you can stop masturbating before you actually ejaculate.

It wonít be long before you find you have much greater ability to maintain a high level of arousal without ejaculating. No matter how rapidly you reach the point of orgasm when you start this exercise, keep going, keep bringing yourself to the point of orgasm in backing off . Use self-discipline so you donít ejaculate, and youíll rapidly find that you can take more stimulation without ejaculating.

The point of this exercise is to discover how you can stimulate yourself for up to 30 minutes without having an orgasm. This is not a technique suitable for men who wan to overcome delayed ejaculation. Bring yourself to the point where you feel you may ejaculate and then stop several times in the half- hour. When youíre satisfied with your level of self- control you can actually enjoy your orgasm and ejaculation.

Although itís a simple exercise extremely powerful, and it will enable you to make love for at least 10 minutes with your partner before you ejaculate. Furthermore, if you do something similar while youíre actually enjoying sex with your partner, youíll be able to find an ability to last longer which you never suspected you possessed.

When you feel that you lack novelty or excitement in your sex life, you may wish to try out something new and exciting the coital alignment technique, perhaps. As sex positions go, it is very rewarding, and can lead to an orgasm for the woman during lovemaking.


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Other pages on the site

 Lack of Arousal and Delayed Ejaculation ] Delayed Ejaculation (Continued) ] Premature Ejaculation ] Premature Ejaculation Part 2 ] Premature Ejaculation Part 3 ] Erectile Dysfunction in Men ] Various Aspects Of Male Sexuality ] All About Semen ]